Advertisments suck

Man, I was so pissed today. You wanna know why? Well if you do, great. If you don't, then I don't give a shit. Okay this is what happened. So I was daydreaming in Tony "the cheerful fascist's" class on Teusday probably about tapping some hot chick. Anyway all of a sudden my fugly phone rings. I pulled it out and only got to see it was a text message before the cheerful fascist yanked it, and happily said, "Well I appreciate your honesty in the matter, and that's whats really important! However, since I masturbate after handing out detentions, I'm going to have to write this one up." So the stupid rule says that a parent has to go pick it up from school. My parents were too lazy, or as they said 'were busy' so my great uncle Emil did. I picked it up from his house today, and I opened it to find the message said something like "Hi! Would you like to upgrade your Sprint PCS vision service to deluxe and pay way more money for shit no one ever needs but only think they do? Well if so, respond to this text which has caused you more grief than your hamster running away ten years ago." Seriously, I already have texting, a pic phone, and like 49 other useless features, why the hell would I upgrade for more shit for more money? I don't get it.
Every time a phone company comes out with new shit, people run to their local radio shack to be the first thugger on the block with instant phone texting mail service or something stupid like that. I mean c'mon, why do people need NASA computers on their phone? Whatever happened to using your phone for calling people. Sure some of the technology is slick, but too much is too much. I don't know why they even call it a phone. They should be selling mini-computers. I want to see a guy holding up a fuckin' laptop to his head, "Can you hear me now pencil-dick?"
What's the deal with that guy anyway? You know he's a douchebag who doesn't have anything else to do but wear stupid glasses and annoy people who don't care that they can talk for 3 extra minutes between the hours of 4 and 5 if the moon is shining and there are 34 clouds in the sky. Thanks for nothing cell phones.